As a very important source of strength and security, cherish public credit. One method of preserving it is to use it as sparingly as possible, avoiding occasions of expense by cultivating peace, but remembering also that timely disbursements to prepare for danger frequently prevent much greater disbursements to repel it, avoiding likewise the accumulation of debt, not only by shunning occasions of expense, but by vigorous exertion in time of peace to discharge the debts which unavoidable wars may have occasioned, not ungenerously throwing upon posterity the burden which we ourselves ought to bear. The execution of these maxims belongs to your representatives, but it is necessary that public opinion should co-operate. To facilitate to them the performance of their duty, it is essential that you should practically bear in mind that towards the payment of debts there must be revenue; that to have revenue there must be taxes; that no taxes can be devised which are not more or less inconvenient and unpleasant; that the intrinsic embarrassment, inseparable from the selection of the proper objects (which is always a choice of difficulties), ought to be a decisive motive for a candid construction of the conduct of the government in making it, and for a spirit of acquiescence in the measures for obtaining revenue, which the public exigencies may at any time dictate.
“Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strive to justify himself. Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person’s precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment.”
Criticism is hard. Even the most gently worded criticism can still sting. As Mr. Carnegie stated, it brings up many painful emotions. People tend to strike back when confronted with criticism.
Criticism should offer a way for the person to improve, without breaking them down. It needs to take into account that it may hurt
It’s a lot easier for an organization to adopt new words than it is to actually change anything.
Real change is uncomfortable. If it’s not feeling that way, you’ve probably just adopted new words.
Something has been in the back of my mind for a while. It’s about the words that people say. Words are funny things – they have different meanings depending on tone, different meanings depending on who says them, different meanings based on where the recipient is in their head. What sounds perfectly reasonable to one person is completely irrational to someone else. Is that right? Not necessarily. A speaker can’t be responsible for controlling where the recipient is in their head, but a speaker can be cognizant of the words they use and how they could be received. On the flip side, a recipient may need to consider the underlying message or thought behind the words. It’s up to both parties to be aware.
Words spoken in anger or disappointment can hurt – even if that’s not the intention. Words spoken with the wrong tone can hurt. Even words said sweetly can hurt if the words themselves aren’t right. Words spoken with contradictory actions leave the recipient wondering what is true. Actions speak louder than words, but actions are diminished if the words don’t match.
One of the things I am working on this year is patience. For those who know me, patience is not one of my strengths. I tend to want things done immediately and to the highest standard possible. This is difficult for me to convey without being frustrated when things don’t happen the way I want them to. Working on this is going to be a struggle – I know this. Add in a busy schedule, two little kids with busy schedules, as well as the number of distractions that are in today’s society and you can see that being patient is larger than just taking the time to breathe or count to 10 or relax.
I am trying to be patient with my words and actions. I am trying to consider the impact that my word choice and tone has on others. I’m trying to pause in important conversations to seek the truly right word or phrase. Too often, I speak before I think – or rather, I’ve thought, but my brain has moved on to the next thing and my mouth is trying to catch up.
I’m also trying to make sure my words and actions match. I don’t want to send contradictory messages. If I say I am going to do something, I’m going to do it. I don’t want to over-commit, but I want to make sure I follow through on those things I have agreed to.
It’s daunting to think that the words you speak (or write) can influence more than just yourself. Those words travel throughout time and space to impact those around you or those you don’t even know. Take the time to consider your words. I know I will.
I apologize, I haven’t been writing much at this blog lately. Things have been pretty busy and my focus has been elsewhere. I’m hoping to get back to a more consistent blogging schedule soon.
In today’s Gospel, Luke says in 21:34-36
“Beware that your hearts do not become drowsy from carousing and drunkenness and the anxieties of daily life, and that day catch you by surprise like a trap. For that day will assault everyone who lives on the face of the earth. Be vigilant at all times and pray that you have the strength to escape the tribulations that are imminent and to stand before the Son of Man.”
I heard this at Mass this morning and it just struck me. How often am I too distracted by what is going on at home or work or society in general to pay attention to the spiritual? I get distracted by Facebook, Twitter, running, house chores, diet, reading, all sorts of things and I don’t take the time to quietly meditate on my relationship with God.
I think it becomes even more apparent at Christmas. Father Jason said this morning (paraphrasing) that in the “world” it’s already Christmas, and that by the time December 25th gets here, everyone’s tired of it. But for Christians who have been paying attention to the meaning behind the season, December 25th is the celebration – we are in a period of waiting. Waiting for the birth of Christ the King. We need to be vigilant for ways to watch for Christ’s blessing during this busy time.
This year, my husband and I are trying to get all of our gift-buying done early. Typically, we don’t start decorating for Christmas until after my birthday and I’d like to have all of our purchases done by then as well this year. I really want to focus my girls on the true meaning of Christmas and taking the time to sit with them and talk about Advent. They see the Advent wreath at Mass, but they don’t know the meanings. I will confess – I don’t truly know them as well. I want to make this season special for them and start creating traditions – now that they are old enough to understand.
I need to be vigilant. I need to watch for those gifts that are presented to me as I go throughout my day. I need to make sure I spend time communing with God, even beyond this season. I need to make sure my heart does not become overwhelmed by daily life.
How will you be vigilant this Advent?
- The Advent Candle (faithfulprovisions.com)